How Do I Know If a Child May Have Experienced Sexual Abuse?

A Child can experience any number of these signs for other stressful times in his/her life such as when having problems in school, a loss of family member, friend or pet or during a divorce. No one of these signs means that your child has experienced sexual abuse but several of these signs mean that you should be investigating.

Physical Indicators:

• Symptoms of sexually transmitted diseases.
• Complaints of pain, irritation, or discharge in the genital area
• Painful urination or defecation
• Repeated complaints of stomach pains, headaches, leg pains, throat infection, etc.
• Change in cleanliness
• Change in clothing, dressing more sexually, more revealing.
• Encopresis (fecal soiling)
• Excessive masturbation
• Sexualized behavior
• Sudden loss of appetite
• Mood swings
• Bed-wetting or thumb sucking at an older age.
  

Behavioral Indicators:

• Severe nightmares
• Social withdrawal
• Onset of depression
• Onset of truancy
• Chronic runaway behavior
• Onset of substance abuse
• Suicide Attempts
• Hints from the child about the incident
• Any story from the child about a “friend” who is experiencing sexual abuse
• Sexual activities with toys or other children such as simulating sex with dolls or asking other children to behave sexually

Create an accepting and supportive environment for the children so that they know they can come to you with questions and concerns for the things that are bothering them. Parents can do this by respecting the child’s privacy and interpersonal boundaries. Fostering good self esteem for the child is also important.

Encourage them to talk freely, in private, about their bodies and teach them the appropriate words for body parts so that they can talk about them.

Teach your children that you will always listen to them and that you will believe them when they have problems or concerns.

Reinforce to the child that it is very important to tell you if anyone ever tries to or does touch them. Stress that you will believe them, not blame them, and never stop loving them.

Here are some good safety rules to teach your children:

• Know important information such as your name and address, telephone number, parent ’s names, and how to dial 911.
• If any stranger approaches you, say no, run away, and tell an adult.
• Always carry change for emergency phone calls home or otherwise.
• Do not get into a car or go anywhere with any person unless your parents have told you it is okay.
• If someone follows you stay away from him or her.
• Remember grownups and others who need help should not be asking children, they should be asking other adults.
• If someone tries to take you somewhere, quickly get away from him or her and yell or scream, “This person is not my parent!”
• Never go anywhere alone.
• If you are in a public place and you get separated from your parents, don’t wander around looking for them. Go to a checkout counter or the lost and found and tell the person in charge that you have lost your mom or dad.
• Always ask permission to leave the yard, play area, or to go into someone’s home.